Day One of the Year 2011
Today, I’ve been hearing voices and seeing hallucinations. Again. This has been going on for about a month or so. I don’t know if I can cope with it for another month. It’s sucking the life out of me, like a leech.
The voices kept telling me to kill myself by sticking eletro cables into my nostrils. Also, they’d tell me to drown myself in the bathroom’s tub.
To them, I am a runaway convict and the authorities will come and get me.
I haven’t been eating nor have I been sleeping for the last few days, when the voices become so noisy and hallucinations pour down like raining cats and dogs.
I am afraid.
Day Two of the Year 2011
My limbs felt stiff. I couldn’t move properly, but this comes and goes, like the ebbing of waves. My limbs would sometimes feel normal, but other times, they’d feel stiff.
My dad noticed the difference, and he asked, “Why are you so stiff?” I couldn’t answer him. Even I don’t know why. I am afraid. Only writing soothes me from my fears and paranoia.
Day Three
It feels good to be with my own self, only me as my own company. I don’t have to feel fearful of interacting with people. I don’t have to endure their opinions of me, talking as if there’s something socially erroneous with me.
Maybe, they see me as a social outcast. I don’t care. I like being by my self.
Day Four
Today, I felt like the radio and the tele were talking to me. I felt scared but curious about it. The radio was luring me to sing along in a deadly game of, like, Jumanji, while the television was talking about a new era that has been created because of me. I felt I was a key personality in causing chaos to my environment.
